To my Grandpa:
Lately there are so many things that I have on my heart, regarding you and what you have done to my family. I know I'll never say them to you...I'm pretty sure you wouldnt even listen. But I have got to get some things off my chest. I'm trying not to be angry at you, because I know in the long run, that only hurts me, but fighting the anger is almost painful. I dont understand you. I dont understand how you can't love your granddaughters enough to accept that there are some things you dont agree on. I never expected you to agree, but I sure didnt think you'd disown. For 6 years we have gone without speaking to you. I have hardly missed you, but I think almost daily about what you have put my family through, and most of all how badly you hurt my dad. He loved you, he respected you, and he cared about you. And you abandoned him, and told him he was a bad father. I wish that I could give you one glimpse into how happy my life is. I am more madly in love than I imagined I could ever be. Bobby takes care and loves me like no other man could. He is going to school to support me, and he just bought me a house. But that doesnt matter to you, because he's black. You will never know the joy of seeing the smile on your granddaughters face that only one man can bring to it. You will never know the happiness of seeing the tears in your son's eyes as he gave me away, to the only man that he knew could take care of me like he always had. Today, I ask God to please, please, once again help me to forgive you. He will be the only Way it'll ever happen.
To my dad:
Words cannot even express how amazing you are. I never meant to cause this much trouble with you and grandpa. Dad, I know you love Bobby as much as I do. And I know that we both believe he was a part of God's plan for my life. Dad, you will never know the weight I carry knowing that your relationship with your father ended because of me. Thank you for standing by me and Bobby. Thank you for never deserting any of us girls for decisions we have made. Thank you for being an amazing dad. You have loved Bobby as your own. I have seen you, on numerous occasions, introduce him to a friend with pride in your eyes. Thank you for not just accepting him, but loving him and calling him your own son. Thank you for being a dad to him. Thank you for loving him, no matter what. I love you.
1 comment:
oh friend...
this is so heartfelt. Who knows why people do the things they do. But, I know for sure your dad wouldn't want you to feel the weight of it. Just as you would fight for Bobby because you love him, so does your dad. You are one lucky girl to have a daddy who is always behind you, and a husband who you are madly in love with...
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